J. S. Allen was born in an Estonian barn in the late 1970s, the result of an experiment in inter-species breeding.
After 30 years wandering the Siberian tundra and communing with every god ever devised by humankind, he found himself deposited in Adelaide by a group of counterculture Martians with the humble task of alleviating all human suffering on Earth.
Twelve days later, he gave up and decided that it would be easier to live forever and develop hi-tech gadgets to keep himself and his harem of 72 virgins entertained.
So far, so good.